Comedy Phonetic Alphabet – Free Download

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Lots of us working with call centres have got used to the common use of the phonetic alphabet.

The use of A for Alpha, B for Bravo and C for Charlie has become a daily occurrence. Every now and again we get to see the funny way it is used or misused – such as “N for Knickers”.

When I was clearing out my Dad’s old papers I came across a comedy phonetic alphabet that started with “A is for ‘Orses” (Hay is for Horses) and “B for Mutton” (Beef or Mutton). I think that it was taken from a music hall sketch that Arthur Askey recorded during the Second World War.

I think that this originated as the Surrealist Alphabet by Clapham and Dwyer sometime before the war, and it has also been named the Cockney Alphabet.

The original recording can be heard here

I have updated this to a modern version that should be easier to follow in modern times.

Modern Comedy Phonetic Alphabet

Modern Comedy Phonetic Alphabet
Modern Comedy Phonetic Alphabet

A is for Horses (Hay is for Horses)

B for Chicken (Beef or Chicken)

C for Miles (See for Miles)

D for Rent (Different)

E for Way (Either Way)

F for Vescence (Effervescence)

G for Police (Chief of Police)

H for Himself (Each for Himself)

I for an Eye (Eye for an Eye)

J for a Good Time (Did You Have a Good Time)

K for Teria (Cafeteria)

L for Leather (Hell for Leather)

M for Sis (Emphasis)

N for Mation (Information)

O for the Hills and Far Away (Over the Hills and Far Away)

P for Relief (Pee for Relief)

Q for a Call Centre (Queue for a Call Centre)

R for Loaf (Half a Loaf)

S for You (It’s for You)

T for Two (Tea for Two)

U for Me (You for Me)

V for España (Viva España)

W for Quits (Double or Quits)

X for Breakfast (Eggs for Breakfast)

Y for Husband (Wife or Husband)

Z for a Doctor (Send for a Doctor)

Printable Modern Comedy Phonetic Alphabet

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Modern Comedy Phonetic Alphabet Free Download
Free Modern Comedy Phonetic Alphabet in Printable PDF Format
Version: 1
Date Added: 5 August 2022
File Type: pdf
File Size: 127 KB
Category: Tools
Download Link: Download

Download Free Modern Comedy Phonetic Alphabet in Editable Word Format

Download Free Modern Comedy Phonetic Alphabet in Editable PowerPoint Format

Original Comedy Phonetic Alphabet

Original Comedy Phonetic Alphabet
Original Comedy Phonetic Alphabet

A is for Horses (Hay is for Horses)

B for Mutton (Beef or Mutton)

C for Islanders (Seaforth Highlanders)

D for Ential (Deferential)

E for Adam (Eve or Adam)

F for Vescence (Effervescence)

G for Police (Chief of Police)

H for Respect (Age for Respect)

I for Novello (Ivor Novello)

J for Oranges (Jaffa Oranges)

K for Answers (Kay Francis)

L for Leather (Hell for Leather)

M for Sis (Emphasis)

N for A Dig (In for a Dig)

O for The Garden Wall (Over the Garden Wall)

P for Penny (Pee for a Penny)

Q for Song (Cue for Song)

R for Mo (Half a Mo’)

S for You (It’s for You)

T for Two (Tea for Two)

U for Films (You for Films?)

V for La France (Vive La France)

W for A Bob (I’ll double you for a Bob)

X for Breakfast (Eggs for Breakfast)

Y for God’s Sake (Why for God’s Sake)

Z for Breeze (Zephyr Breeze)

Printable Original Comedy Phonetic Alphabet

Do you want to download this to share with your team?

Get your free download of the Original Comedy Phonetic Alphabet now:

Have you got a funnier version for any of these?

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To discover more about the phonetic alphabet, read these articles next:

Author: Robyn Coppell
Reviewed by: Megan Jones

Published On: 29th Jul 2022 - Last modified: 24th Jan 2024
Read more about - Skills, , , , ,

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